In this thought-provoking essay, Elise Seyfried reflects on the stark differences between raising children in the 1990s and guiding grandchildren through adolescence in the mid-2020s. As a mother of five who navigated parenting without smartphones or social media, she shares her observations about how drastically the world has evolved. From the absence of school shootings during her children’s teenage years to the current reality of active shooter drills in elementary schools, Seyfried acknowledges that while times have changed significantly, certain principles of parenting remain timeless. Her insights focus on fostering open communication, embracing self-expression, addressing mental health honestly, and encouraging volunteerism as ways to support today’s teens.
Elise Seyfried raised her five children in an era when technology was nascent and societal concerns were vastly different. In the 1990s, Blockbuster ruled video rentals, AOL Instant Messenger facilitated online chats, and malls served as primary gathering spots for teenagers. Back then, schools operated with unlocked doors, and parents relied on strict timekeeping rather than cellphones to coordinate pick-ups. Fast forward to the present day, where her grandchildren face challenges unimaginable just decades ago—ranging from heightened security measures at public events to the lingering effects of the COVID-19 pandemic.
Today’s teens live in a world dominated by digital connectivity, with smartphones enabling both convenience and potential pitfalls like cyberbullying. Education and housing costs have skyrocketed, making financial independence more daunting for young adults. Despite these changes, Seyfried emphasizes maintaining open lines of communication with teenagers. She notes that as kids grow older, they often retreat into their own worlds, but creating a judgment-free space encourages them to share their experiences. Texting may replace face-to-face conversations, but it remains a vital channel for staying connected.
Seyfried also advocates for accepting forms of self-expression such as unique hairstyles, tattoos, and piercings. These once-taboo choices are now widely accepted in many professional settings, rendering past arguments about career implications obsolete. Furthermore, she stresses the importance of discussing mental health openly, particularly given its increasing prevalence among younger generations. Drawing from her personal experience with bipolar disorder, she highlights the value of destigmatizing therapy and medication.
Volunteering emerges as another key aspect of Seyfried’s advice. By engaging alongside her children in community service activities, she instilled values of empathy and action-oriented optimism. She looks forward to continuing this tradition with her grandsons, urging them to identify causes they care about deeply and work toward meaningful change. Through collective efforts involving grandparents, parents, and children, she believes society can address even the most pressing modern challenges.
Though the landscape of adolescence has shifted dramatically since the 1990s, Elise Seyfried remains hopeful. By adapting traditional wisdom to contemporary realities, she envisions a brighter future for today’s teens. Her message resonates not only with parents but also with anyone seeking to understand and support the next generation as they navigate an increasingly complex world.